Anger is a normal experience for everyone. It can even be a useful when managed appropriately to assert oneself or manage a negative confrontation. Particularly in young children, angry outbursts and tantrums are a normal part of growing up. However, when it is so regular that it starts to affect important parts of their life, such as their family and work relationships – it can be problematic.
It can be difficult to see your child lack control in their emotions, and to see the effect that it is having on their lives. You may have tried to talk to them about it or tried to encourage them to get help, but it just seems to make them angrier. This is common, as many people with excessive anger are unable to identify that it is a concern or refuse to be controlled. However, without help it can continue to affect their ability to get through the challenges of life and can have a negative impact on the whole family.
Some indications that your child may have anger that is significant and in need of help includes:
- They appear to have either a constant feeling, or random outbursts, of irritability, rage and anxiety
- They commonly resort to verbal, emotional, physical or psychological attacks when a disagreement arises
- They have not done anything to change their behaviour or their anger has worsened when you have expressed concern about it
- They have an increasing amount of conflict within their relationships with others
- They are using alcohol and drugs to manage their anger
- Their anger lasts a lot longer and is more extreme than one would normally be given the situation
- Situations unrelated to the event are impacted by their anger
Besides these more visible effects, anger can also have a negative impact on a person’s long-term health, regardless of whether it’s expressed or bottled up. Some of the issues that are at a higher risk for people with anger issues in the long term include headaches, insomnia, other mental health disorders (i.e. depression and anxiety), high blood pressure, skin problems, and can even increase the chances of having a heart attack or stroke.
If your child will not seek help on their own and you don’t know where to turn, the practitioners at VCPS are specialised to provide you with the support to overcome this. They can help you to better support your child, or work with your child directly in managing their anger. Some of the methods that may be used include:
- Finding ways to discuss with the individual the effects that their anger is having on the family
- Identifying the triggers of anger so it can be prevented
- Teaching you to manage your own emotions so that you can better react to the situation
- Developing strategies to appropriately manage anger and other negative emotions when they arise
- Teaching ways to be assertive and other alternatives that can be used to resolve conflict
- Working together to encourage the individual to accept help and take on the one-to-one assistance
- If it’s a young child, working with them in an interactive and fun way in order to teach them about emotions and how they can better control them
