Anger is a normal experience for everyone. It can even be a useful when managed appropriately to assert oneself or manage a negative confrontation. However, when it starts to affect important parts of life, such as family and work relationships – it can become problematic. If this is the case for somebody in your family, you are not alone. Many people cope with it without any help until it starts to severely impair the lives of the whole family.
Some indications that someone in your family may have anger that is significant and in need of help includes:
- They seem to have a constant feeling, or random outbursts, of irritability, rage and anxiety
- They commonly resort to verbal, emotional, physical or psychological attacks when a disagreement arises
- They have not done anything to change their behaviour or their anger has worsened when you have expressed concern about it
- They have an increasing amount of conflict within their relationships with others
- They are using alcohol and drugs to manage their anger
- Their anger lasts a lot longer and is more extreme than one would normally be given the situation
- Situations unrelated to the event are impacted in a negative way
Besides these more visible effects, anger can also have a negative impact on a person’s long-term health, regardless of whether it’s expressed or bottled up. Some of the concerns that are at a higher risk for people with anger challenges include headaches, insomnia, other mental health disorders (i.e. depression and anxiety), high blood pressure, skin problems, and in the long-term it can even increase the chances of having a heart attack or stroke.
If you are unable to help the person alone and don’t know where to turn, the practitioners at VCPS are specialised to provide you with the support to overcome this and build back a positive relationship again. Some of the methods that may be used to support you include:
- Finding ways to discuss with the individual the effects that their anger is having on the family
- Identifying the triggers of anger so it can be prevented
- Teaching you to manage your own emotions so that you can better react to the situation
- Developing strategies to appropriately manage anger and other negative emotions when they arise
- Learning how to appropriate address this with kids or other people who are affected
- Teaching ways to be assertive and other alternatives that can be used to resolve conflict
- Working together to encourage the individual to accept help and take on the one-to-one assistance
